Friday, June 15, 2012
I'm about to embark on a new journey in life...one that I've always known that I wanted but never knew how exactly it would play out. I've resigned from my job and will be staying home full time with my kids. I have one more day of work...one more day until I step away from what I once called my dream job. One more day until I say goodbye to some of the most amazing people I know...the people that call me their counselor. Those that allow me the privilege of journeying with them through the most difficult seasons of their lives. I'm not sure I can stomach it...it's just so hard to say goodbye. I've learned so much about myself, my career, and about God through this job. I can't quite imagine my life without it. Why am I leaving such a great situation? God told me. (I actually hate when people say that). How did he tell me? Was I hearing voices? Did I have a dream? No, I asked him. Then I waited for a few weeks...and stressed...and cried...and prayed...sought wise counsel...and then I had peace. Yep...just like all of those other testimonies you hear in the church. What does peace look like? Well, it feels better, it is clear, it doesn't contradict scripture or Godly counsel, it is patient, you just know. God told me to go home...and raise my babies. He told me to go home and support my husband. God told me to focus on ending sex trafficking. He told me not to worry about losing a part of my identity for a time...that it would all be worth it when my babies look into my eyes and say "uv you too nonnie" or when my husband walks into the house and says "you are the best thing that ever happened to me". This is truly one of the most difficult decisions that I've had to make...not because I don't want to stay home, but because I want BOTH! I love what I do. But...there is a little spark inside that keeps me going...knowing that God is doing something crazy again...I can feel it. For now, a piece of each client will remain in my heart always...and someday it would be a such an amazing blessing if our paths could cross again.